Paper Winter

Paper Winter by Alex CvijovicChristmas is over and the New Year is in full swing. We are all back at work and Overwaitea has the Valentine confectionery out already. The weather has been interchangeable, convincing us that rain is the new form of snow.

What to do when it is a wet weather play day?

Do you remember playing with paper dolls when you were a kid? This redundant form of play and creativeness will make you all turn off the television and hold a glue stick in hand. Continuing with the theme of last week’s Cut’n’Paste, I have created something you can all cut and paste together…

I have composed a selection of items which you will all be missing from your winter wardrobe. Now you can show Mum in Australia and the Grandparents in Ontario all that Christmas money they sent you has been utilized in suitable clothes, other than on Fernie First Trax.

All you need to do is find the most pleasing photograph of yourself or friend, then dress it up with your new wardrobe. I shall run through this week’s Top Ten key pieces:

1. Florescent work-wear. Not only for the workman in your life, this item can be used to keep you dry during those heavy downpours and keep you visible during a whiteout. I wouldn’t suggest hitch hiking in the outfit, you may be asked to maintain the highway.

2. Toy Dog. For those skiers that don’t ski, but want to been seen. Let this cute companion bring you girls who will just want to stroke this chick puller.

3. Kiss Me Quick Hat. A basic buy while on holiday in England. Why not bring this souvenir into Fernie’s circulation?!

4. Bad Sweater. Why not!?

5. Leather Pants. Water repellent, a great protector and a massive turn on for the opposite sex.

6. Olympic Jersey. If you’re still not quite reaching the athletic skills of Olympians, wear this jersey to convince others.

7. One- Piece. Every ski hill has them and every one should own one. This is a new one-piece from a range at WillyFinder.

8. Fur Coat. At a high majority of Europeans ski resorts and very pimp. You can wear this one in paper, though I am not condoning the fur trade. Keep fur on the mammals that need them.

9. I Love Canada Hat. Because you are all so patriotic.

10. Tie Dyed T-Shirt. They just look cool and horrid at the same time.
For the person/team who creates the most imaginable Paper Doll I shall personally buy you a Mystery Price from the Salvation Army for your efforts.

Please send all entries to

The winning entry shall be shown next week.


2 responses to “Paper Winter

  1. Feeling very sorry for consonants “G” & “H”.

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